Otis the cat meets Robo Fish

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Otis—My little Paper Bag Prince

Why bother sleeping in the comfort of a bed
when you can snooze on paper bags?That’s my Otis.If it makes a crinkling noise,
then it’s the perfect place to curl up and relax.

Random shit that pops into my mind for no good reason while I’m doing my daily exercise walk

“I think the problem with ISIS is that they’ve never learned how to chill out. Think how beneficial it would be if we shipped an army of yoga instructors over to their training camps in Afghanistan. I mean, why not?—They’re already wearing loose clothing, and their prayer position is almost identical to a yoga pose—why not just continue with some Downward Dogs and Warrior (excuse the pun) poses too?And while we’re at it, instead of fighter jets, the Western world could send over fleets of crop dusters loaded with weed. They could fly over the training camps and douse everyone in clouds of smoke. How much happier would our world be if all that rage and drive for vengeance was replaced with giggling fits and cravings for Doritos!”

 

Random shit that pops into my mind for no good reason while I’m doing my daily exercise walk


“I’m looking up at the beautiful expanse of blue sky above me as I walk, and I’m thinking how amazing it is that it’s exactly the same sky that I played under when I was a little girl. The same sky that I gazed up at to watch clouds drift by on a summer day. The same sky that blazed with sunshine on my wedding day. The same sky that sent down a gentle dusting of snowflakes on the day that my daughter was born. The same sky that’s been above me for as long as I’ve existed on earth. And for infinite years before me. The same sky that dinosaurs and Neanderthals roamed beneath.

Will that same sky be there for future generations to appreciate? I can only pray.

As long as men like Kim Jong Ugh, Vladimir PU-tin, Donald Grump, et al., exist—
men who delight in their power to make things go boom—who knows?

For now, I am looking up at that blue, blue sky, and I’m so happy that it’s still there.”

Random shit that pops into my mind for no good reason while I’m doing my daily exercise walk

Every day, I go for my exercise walk outside, rain or shine. I put on my headphones, listen to great music, and walk to the beat. I’ve found that I brainstorm some of my best ideas for new projects or stories while I’m walking.

I’ve also found that some really crazy-ass, random thoughts will pop into my mind for no good reason, and I’ve started writing them down, just for fun.

Every so often, I’ll share these thoughts here because… well, why not?

A sample of the random shit that pops into my mind for no good reason while I’m doing my daily exercise walk:

“What’s it like to be dead?

I know that lots of people have died and been revived, then gushed about how beautiful death is and how sad they were to have to come back to life on earth.

But how about all the ones who didn’t come back? Is it possible that, during their journey through the tunnel, they kicked and screamed and told God to go find some other sucker? Might they have been screaming things like, “Blimey! Why didn’t I just eat that effing piece of cheesecake the other night! Like it matters up here what my ass looks like!” or
“It bloody well figures. Now I’ll never get to buy a Prada bag or Miu Miu heels! I penny pinched and plucked, and now my kid will be livin’ large—thanks to el cheapo!” or
“Shit! Did I turn off the stove this morning?”

And then again—just in case the powers that be are reading my mind right now—I take it back. I don’t really want to know the answer after all. I’d like to just forget about it and put my focus back on Diana Ross & The Supremes, OK?”

A churchy kind of poem

Spring is here… it’s the time of year when children begin to wind down the school year in preparation for summer vacation, and those in Catholic schools are getting ready to celebrate their First Communion or Confirmation.

My poem is for all the parents who’ve been there, done that,
and all of those who are about to.

Confirmation

Perched in church,
nephew’s confirmation,
swaddled in finery,
big family occasion.

Grandma on the aisle,
camera poised.
Grandpa hunched,
both eyes closed.

Cousins ahead,
aunties behind,
uncles a-twitch
in neckties that bind.

Impure thoughts,
flecked with guilt.
Long time since
confessions spilt.

Mind’s a-wandering,
what a sinner…
wondering what
we’ll have for dinner.

We sit. We stand.
We stand. We sit.
Unfold the bench
and kneel a bit.

We genuflect,
we sing a hymn,
we bow our heads
and pray to Him.

Ah, sermon’s over,
we’ve all been blessed.
Tumultuous minds
for now at rest.

We chatter, we shuffle,
our exit’s begun.
We burst through the doors.
Church is done.

 

What do you get when you put Jack White + The Edge + Jimmy Page together in one room?

The only part of the Grammys that I bothered tuning in to this year was when Lady Gaga and Metallica strapped their TNT together and proceeded to detonate on-stage. As for the rest of the acts? They just didn’t spark my batteries.

Don’t get me wrong—I do love Adele. And Carrie Underwood. And Alicia Keys. And that Bruno Mars guy isn’t half bad (his music aside; I would kill to have his flawless skin!). 

 

But most of the meh music of today just doesn’t do it for me.

There is nothing—and I mean NOTHING—that makes my atoms hum like the thunder of drumsticks gone berserk along with the furious keening of an electric guitar. Obvious, isn’t it, that I was a child of the seventies?

Which takes me to an extraordinary documentary on Netflix that I watched the other night, called It Might Get Loud.

If, like me, you miss the days when you’d turn on the radio and hear the kind of music that made you drop whatever you were holding in your hands to play air guitar, you’ll relish this coming together of Jack White, The Edge, and Jimmy Page, during which they share their love of insane guitar playing.

Talented really isn’t a strong enough word to describe these three men, and it’s stirring to see the raw passion they have for their craft. Driven by this passion since childhood—that they’ve achieved such heights is kismet. What’s fun about the documentary is the way it was filmed—it’s just the three musicians sitting around a coffee table in an old warehouse, sharing stories of their musical journeys and their love for music and playing guitar riffs together, with flashbacks here and there of different key periods in their lives.

Jack White is an absolute force to be reckoned with. And The Edge is, of course, The Edge. But … holey moley ravioli! … Mr. Jimmy Page is ageless when he picks up his guitar. The man is truly a guitar god. 

There’s no doubt about it. You’ll want the volume on full, even though It Might Get Loud.

My Otis—A most fascinating cat!

Poor Otis. He’s a boy cat but I’m guilty of forcing him to model lady cat hats for my own selfish amusement.

So here’s the thing. He has this toy fish that was on its last legs, so instead of throwing it in the trash, I thought I’d combine it with some netting and sequins and other baubles to create a “lady cat fascinator.”

For those of you who don’t really know me—I assure you that I’m not some batshit crazy cat lady—I simply like to have some fun once in a while at the expense of my poor, beloved cat.

I wonder if he’s swearing at me right now in cat-speak?

So without further ado, here is my baby boy, who is thoroughly pissed off and trying to escape me (and his new hat) in every photo.

Honestly, it’s not as outlandish as some of the fascinators I’ve seen women wearing in photos at that Ascot event in England! (haha)

This photo is most representative of the many photos I tried to take of him. He just refused to keep still!

Global warming is alive and well in Toronto

Ok. It’s February, right? Or did I fall asleep and miss a couple of months?
I just went outside for my daily walk, and it’s so warm, I had to peel off my coat and walk in t-shirt sleeves. And I was still working up a sweat! Today is supposed to break historic weather records. Winter has sure changed since the days of yore…

Last week…

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This week…

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Hot damn! I’d like to give that groundhog a great big bear hug!

 

TV hasn’t been this much fun since the 80s… You’ve just gotta watch Suits!

My full-blown addiction began with a bit of curiosity about Meghan Markle. You know—the lucky girl who, out of the millions of girls in this world, just happened to be the one to capture Prince Harry’s heart. She’s not old-money blueblood or even an English rose, but an American actress with a role in a TV series called Suits—a TV series that just happens to be filmed in my corner of the world…Toronto.

 

As a person who tries to avoid wasting precious time in front of a television (there’s no room in my life for any of that trite reality crap that the networks can’t seem to be able to think beyond), I rarely watch anything but documentaries, stand-up comics, and movies on Netflix.

A few weeks ago while browsing around the public library, I noticed a copy of the Season Five DVD of Suits. I picked it up, read the description on the back, and thought that maybe if we had nothing better to do on Friday night, I’d talk Paul into checking out the first episode of Season One on Netflix. Again, I was more drawn to having a look at this girl who had bagged Prince Harry than I was to watching a show that I expected would put me into snooze mode.

 

Wrong! Snooze we did not. After only a few weeks, we just finished Season Five. Suits is crack! We are hooked! We barely swallowed our dinner before racing to the TV to gobble another episode for dessert.

 

I was addicted to L.A. Law in the late 80s and early 90s, and Suits is my new L.A. Law. No reality crap here—just fresh legal eagle drama served with a good dollop of humor and plenty of eye candy!NUP_149295_0300.jpg

The main character, Harvey Specter (Gabriel Macht) is not only the coolest guy on the planet (commitment issues? who cares!), he is also the eye candy of all eye candy. His sidekick, Mike Ross (Patrick J. Adams) is the smartest guy on earth and eye candy #2. Then there’s Louis Litt (Rick Hoffman) whose facial expressions and slimy antics add all the laughs. The ladies are great too: head honcho Jessica Pearson (Gina Torres), secretary extraordinaire Donna Paulsen (Sarah Rafferty), and last but not least, paralegal darling Rachel Zane played by Meghan Markle.harvey-mike-louis

The writing on this show is great. The acting is superb. The dialogue is so clever and quick, we are captivated from the moment we tune in until the credits roll. What surprises me most is that this show hasn’t had tons more press.

The only hokey thing about the show is that the law offices are supposedly based in New York City (thus all of the aerial shots of NYC featured at the start of many episodes), yet viewers familiar with Toronto will easily be able to identify a variety of landmarks in the outdoor shots. Obviously, they shoot the show in Toronto because it’s cheaper, but the network that produces it is American, therefore the NYC storyline. But, hey, I can overlook that, since it’s one of the most entertaining series on TV today, in my books.

As for Meghan Markle…if she’s really as sweet as her character Rachel, then it’s absolutely no surprise that Prince Harry has fallen in love with her.

So—now we’ve finished Season Five. Season Six isn’t yet on Netflix, but I imagine we’ll be able to stream it somehow to our TV. It was recently in the news that USA Network renewed Suits for a seventh season, to begin shooting this spring.

 

For now, it ain’t over till it’s over, and I can barely wait to begin a marathon weekend of Season Six!

Check out these promo video clips:

Season 1 Promo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HOi7_d3GOFI

Season 2 Promo: http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2909512217

Season 3 Promo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcHx4UCqQa8

Season 4 Promo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCaYiGQzigo

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