Handsome Otis models an ice-cream sundae hat

He’s not particularly fond of ice-cream, but nevertheless, poor Otis found himself coerced into modelling my spool-knitted “ice-cream sundae hat.”
Much to Otis’s dismay, I recently felt an urge to try some spool knitting, or as we used to call it when we were kids, “corking.”

I can remember my best friend and I learning to cork using old wooden thread spools with four nails hammered into the tops of each. Today’s spool knitters are much fancier, not that the results are any better than what we got from those old wooden spools!I had a collection of bits and pieces of old yarn ends, so I corked a long cord, then wound it around and hand-sewed it together to create the “sundae.”
Next, I used some red yarn to make a pompom: the cherry on top.
It is Otis’s plea that I refrain from using him to model any more yarn fashions.

“Get this @#%$!!! hat OFF me!”

Otis likes to keep a close eye on Backyard Bunny

He has suggested that, instead, I consider using his good friend, Backyard Bunny, as my model—that is, if I am ever able to catch him!

Otis will never be The Cat in The Hat

cats in hats bookI’ve been noticing, both in the news and online, that there seems to be a growing fashion trend: tiny hats for cats. Not only are there gazillions of cat hats for sale on Etsy and at other online stores, there are tons of DIY patterns if you want to make your own hat for a cat. I even discovered a new book at my community library called Cats In Hats, by Sara Thomas. The hats in there were a riot!

Much to my best buddy Otis’s dismay, nothing makes me more gleeful than seeing pets dressed up in human clothing. Really, don’t they just look so dang blasted cute?otis in baby bonnet1

As you may have noticed in a couple of my past blog posts, I have tried to dress Otis in various accoutrements, but trying to get his cooperation is about as easy as getting Donald Trump to shut up. I swear—that cat has moves as smooth as a martial arts black belt.

So, the other day, after a hell of a scuffle, Otis was forced to humor me by wearing a lovely bonnet that I recently crocheted; then later, a cat-sized jester’s hat and collar.

otis in baby bonnet2As you can see by the expressions (or lack thereof) on his face, he was NOT amused. (I know that cats aren’t thought of as having any facial expressions, but believe me, they do if you try to dress them up!)

My poor little boy. I do hope he’ll forgive me. 🙂otis in joker costume1

The Cat in the Christmas Tree Hat (is not a very happy cat)

If you’re a knit- or crochet-a-holic and you share an abode with a cat, you may have discovered that your cat delights in watching you work your magic with your needles/hook and yarn.

xmas tree hat for catBut if your cat is like my Otis—strongly averse to being dressed in tiny outfits with matching accessories—certain needlework projects have the capacity to make his back arch, his fur stand on end, and cause a mighty scrambling of paws as … away he flies like the down on a thistle.

And what sort of project would prompt that kind of reaction?

wearing his new xmas tree hat5

Giving me a dirty look.

If you guessed a cat hat, you’re absolutely right!

So now guess what I made for Otis.

I discovered the most adorable crochet pattern for a tiny tabletop Christmas tree at a really cool crochet and craft site called Pops de Milk. But instead of using it as an ornament, I imagined instead how festive it would look on top of Otis’s bare little head. 🙂

wearing his new xmas tree hat4

If cats could swear…

You can find the SO easy-to-make pattern at this link: http://popsdemilk.com/crochet-christmas-tree-buttons-2/) I used emerald-green worsted weight yarn and a 4 mm hook, and left it hollow instead of crocheting a base. I finished the bottom edge with one round of single-crochet in red yarn, then chained a strap just long enough to fit under his chin and button up on the other side to keep the hat from falling off. (Until it’s been stubbornly shaken off, that is.)

Then after digging through my cupboard of notions for some buttons and a string of tiny decorative Christmas lights, I sewed everything onto the tree. The entire project was completed in an evening.

Otis was only very briefly willing to model his new Christmas Tree hat, and I had to pay him afterward with treats. Monkey is now the new owner.

wearing his new xmas tree hat3wearing his new xmas tree hat1xmas tree hat on monkey

Introducing…The next Sports Illustrated cover model

otis poses1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well…even though he is a dude and he has no breasts and could use some major manscaping, he is magnificent enough to scoop the next Sports Illustrated cover, no?

otis poses3

 

 

 

 

 
Meet my man Otis who, in a brief moment of abandon, permitted me to shoot him as he posed before a window, hoping to attract any “birds” passing by outside.

After the photo shoot, he grunted a few answers to my interview questions (he’s much like Keith Richards—often difficult to understand) and then promptly turned his back and sauntered away before I could properly finish the interview. Such a rock star.

otis poses2

Interview with Otis M., next SI model and cultural icon

My nickname: Oats, Oatie

My peeps would describe me as:
Devoid of morals, always ready to roll onto my back when I see a hand…any hand; aloof, yet surging with passion at the sight of a full dinner bowl or a chunk of fine cheddar; a trifle lazy, lounging around on cushions all day with one eye open while I watch the old lady work, but afire with piss and vinegar at the sight of the old lady manipulating a yarn ball.

Advice I hear constantly but choose never to heed:
“Otis, NO!” or “Get away from those plants!” or “GET DOWN from that table!” or “Get out of there!” Take your pick.

If you look in my personal basket, you’re apt to find:
(1) a couple of fugly cloth mice that I wish were real so I could rip their beady little eyes from their heads; (2) one of those preposterous DOG sweaters that the old lady forced over my head JUST ONCE—After the ruckus I raised, she finally got with the program—MY program—It’s always MY program. Capeesh?; (3) a ball with a bell in it that gives me a raging headache; (4) a stick with some feathers glued on it that just pisses me off because it reminds me that the old lady won’t let me outside to get at some REAL feathered friends; (5) a fabulous crocheted string that the old lady made for me to rip around the house with; (6) a spider I captured the other day and am saving for continued fun at a later date.

My celebrity crush is:
Paws down—it’s Pussy Galore from that James Bond movie that I watched with the old lady.

My favourite treat is:
(Sorry folks. No answer. Otis has left the building.)

otis walks away

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To end this thing today on a more creative note, here’s a poem I wrote about a cat who isn’t keen on monkeys.

Monkey

I was just an itty bitty boy,
When Gran made me a special toy,
A monkey made from bits of sock,
Companion, though he couldn’t talk.

Monkey shared my trundle bed,
His tail curled ‘round my sleepy head,
Kept the boogey men at bay,
All through the night, till break of day.

One morning Mr. Puss, our cat,
Chewed the tassel clean from Monkey’s hat,
Carried it to his hiding place,
Left a ragged hole near Monkey’s face.

Grandma cooed and dried my tears,
Eased my heart of all its fears,
Was Monkey now in awful pain?
Would he ever be the same again?

When I awakened from my nap,
Monkey wore a brand new cap,
Fresh tassel of red upon his head,
Fixed up and propped upon my bed.

I squealed with joy and hugged him near,
His monkey grin stretched ear to ear,
While Mr. Puss appeared to doze,
One wicked eye on Monkey’s nose.

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