Crocheted Jingle Bells Tablet Clutch

Yes, I know that summer’s barely over and here I am talking about jingle bells! But I felt like working on something quick and easy and I thought I’d make something fun to use during the here-before-you-know-it Christmas season.

bag_clutch jingle bells1I just used a basic ripple pattern, alternating red and white yarn. Instead of using buttons, I sewed on little jingle bells and made crocheted loops to fasten over them.

Très festive, oui?

Here’s the pattern I used, along with a 5.5 mm hook, one ball each of red worsted weight and white worsted weight yarns.

Using red yarn, chain 28 (or whatever the width of your tablet)

Row 1: 2 single crochet (sc) in second chain from hook; *sc in each of the next 7 chains (ch); skip 1 ch; sc in each of the next 7 ch; 3 sc in next ch; repeat from * across to the end. In the last ch, work 2 sc.

Row 2: Ch 1; 2 sc in first st; *sc in each of next 7 sts; skip 2 sc; sc in each of next 7 sts; 3 sc in next st; repeat from * across to the end. In the last st, work 2 sc.

Repeat Row 2, changing colours after every 3 rows.

bag_clutch jingle bells2Once you have a block that’s large enough to fold and contain your tablet, sc right around all edges to finish it neatly. Then fold it into a clutch shape, and on wrong side, stitch together side seams. Sew 3 little jingle bells in place as shown in photo, then use sc to make 3 loops (see photo for placement) for fastening over bells.

I’m never certain that my instructions are clear enough, so as back up, here’s a great free pattern for a crochet clutch in the same ripple pattern at a wonderful crochet site called Fiber Flux; here’s the link: http://www.fiberfluxblog.com/2014/01/free-crochet-patterngraphic-chevron.html

The incalculable value of keeping an eReader in your pocket or purse at all times—especially at this time of year

You’re standing in line at the supermarket.

It’s a v-e-r-y l-o-n-g line.

Every second person ahead of you needs a price check.

Or they have armloads of flyers that they want to show to the cashier for price guarantee comparisons.

Or they’re v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y reaching into their cart and v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y placing one item at a time onto the conveyor belt, and you’re beginning to wish you had a taser gun in your hand to prompt them to get their ass moving…

Your teeth are clenching…

Now they’re grinding and little bits of enamel are flying every which way…

Now they’re gnashing back and forth—foam is bubbling up from the corners of your mouth and your eyes are glowing like firepit coals…

Did you know that on average, we each spend an estimated 45 to 62 minutes waiting for something every day: waiting in lines, waiting in medical offices, waiting for employee assistance in stores, and so on. In general, we are destined to waste no less than five years of our life…waiting.

You are sitting in your doctor’s waiting room. You booked your time slot two months ago and expected to be taken within minutes of entering the door, especially since you were considerate enough to arrive 15 minutes early for your 3:00 appointment. It is now 4:10, and there are still six people waiting ahead of you. Your skin is turning a rich shade of claret and your ears are venting what appears to be smoke. Doctor is going to have a lot more to do than just weigh you and tell you to say “ahh” because you are seriously on the verge of gnawing off your limbs…

We wait for deliveries, for our electronic devices to boot up, for humans to answer their phones, for contractors to show up and start the job, for our hairstyling appointments, for bank tellers, for arrivals and departures at airports, for public transit, for parking spots, for restaurant seating, for commercials to end, for entertainment to start, for people who are late, for the microwave to beep, for the UPS guy, for just about EVERY EFFING THING IN OUR CONFOUNDED LIVES!

You need to ask the post office a quick question about a parcel you’d like to send to a friend across the pond. You’ve already spent half the morning trying to locate answers on their website, to no avail. So you decide to throw in the towel and give them a call. You’ve been listening to canned music now for 35 minutes and you don’t think you’ll ever be able to untwist your neck from its current position. If drywall wasn’t so freaking expensive these days, you would punch a goddam hole in the wall…

Has my suggestion for carrying an eReader around at all times become an “Aha!” moment for you?

I can assure you that time spent with your eReader while you wait is the healthiest choice you can make, especially when the only other alternative is high blood pressure and/or a possible life sentence in prison for murder.

With your eReader charged up and ready to go at all times, you will not only be the only person in lineup hell who is smiling and relaxed in posture, you’ll also be the only person in line whose brain cells are getting in a nice little yoga workout instead of atrophying like the moron ahead of you who’s holding up the line while they fight with the cashier over a price comparison between two brands that aren’t remotely related. You won’t even notice the little old lady who’s counting out her $40 balance in nickels.

My Kobo Arc has added many years to my lifespan. It’s my fountain of youth.
I so heart my Kobo Arc!

Crochet a cute clutch for your eReader

bag_clutch cath wheel purple & mint2 copyIf I’m going to carry my Arc everywhere I go, I want to keep it protected from scratches and bumps. I found this free clutch pattern, called the Easy Paolo Purse at the wonderful FaveCrafts site: http://www.favecrafts.com/Crochet-Bags/Easy-Paolo-Purse.

It was my first attempt at the Catherine wheel design and I found it to be very easy to follow and fun to do. I also love how the pattern makes the colours pop! I used purple, mint green, and cream, but it would look lovely with just about any combination of colours. And it fits my Arc like a glove.

bag_clutch cath wheel purple & mint1 copy

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